10. Oprah stops talking about how she constantly gains and loses weight.
Author's Note: For god sakes woman, you are the poster whale for yo-yo. JUST STOP OBSESSING, EAT THE DAMN COOKIES, and SHUT IT.
9. The Jonas Brothers go away as quickly as they came.
Author's Note: Which, as the legend goes, is pretty quick considering that they are slightly past the age of counting the number of pubes on their Ken dolls.
8. My economic stimulus package hurts. Stop the hurty.
7. Better and more viral videos than EVAR BEFORE.
Author's Note: This is sarcastic. Don't send me forwards. Don't send me videos, and then only write in the email, "You've GOT to see this." If you don't tell me what it is I'm about to look at, I won't look at.
6. No laying off. But lots of getting laid!!
Author's note: Um, do I really need to explain this one??
5. Travel to exotic locations.
4. Less hints from my grandmother about my getting knocked up.
Author's note: This would be heaven, except for the warning in my heart that this will never, ever happen. Ever.
3. Make a kickass movie.
Author's note: This is underway, and will hopefully have positive results by the end of the summer.
2. Me, on a label, with an album under my belt.
Author's Note: I'm counting on all five of you to promote the hell out of my music, when, you know, I write it and record it and start playing it all over the world. Yeah. So get on that.
1. A Happier Me!
Author's final note: Yes, this list is extremely self-serving. I would like to thank my local grocery store self-check out for the inspiration necessary to write such an amazingly insightful blog. I owe it all to you, machine that replaced the sweet old lady in a green apron.
Showing posts with label top tens. Show all posts
Showing posts with label top tens. Show all posts
8.19.2008
Boo's Top Ten: Why Margaret Cho Rocks
10. She's SOOOO nineties. It makes me super nostalgic.
9. She's Korean, and therefore most likely shares my intense love of kimchee.
8. She met Arsenio Hall. (A personal hero of mine.)
7. A pretty freaking hilarious comic.
6. Talks very openly about her drug addiction and subsequent recovery.
5. A huge supporter of gay, lesbian, bi, and transgender rights.
4. She does a burlesque routine.
3. Wearing a fake penis.
2. While showing her beautiful and imperfect belly.
1. And her amazing tattoo work, some of which was done by the legendary Ed Hardy.
8.13.2008
Boo's Top Ten: Why I Love Where I Live
10. Great local music and venues.
9. It is just as easy to go out and be crazy on the weekends, or stay in and be lazy.
8. Small town appeal; metropolitan attitude (kinda).
7. You can get anyway in or around town in 15 mintues. Period.
6. The area is a haven for creativity. It must be the crystals in the bedrock.
5. The liberally-minded oasis of the South. And it ain't Atlanta.
4. The beautiful beautiful mountains!!
3. Swimming in the coldest water holes supplied by fresh mountain water. And jumping off rocks.
2. Crisp, chilly, foggy summer mornings.
1. Local food. Buying fresh figs and blackberries from the gentleman farmer that comes into the downtown restaurants. And then eating said figs for breakfast with yogurt, honey, and walnuts. YUMMMMM. And making blackberry cobbler with orange essence in the crust. Oh yes. You know you want it.
If you aren't from here, or aren't familiar with the area, you really should check it out. And this coming from a person that silently curses the stupid tourists, especially when they attempt to parallel park for 15 minutes before just giving up and driving away, all the while you've been sitting behind them, waiting, because they can't get their big freakin' SUV into the space, or out of the way enough for you to scoot by. And this is NOT a hard town to drive in. AT ALL.
But seriously, if you haven't visited, you should. I hear the leaf change this year is going to be glorious.
9. It is just as easy to go out and be crazy on the weekends, or stay in and be lazy.
8. Small town appeal; metropolitan attitude (kinda).
7. You can get anyway in or around town in 15 mintues. Period.
6. The area is a haven for creativity. It must be the crystals in the bedrock.
5. The liberally-minded oasis of the South. And it ain't Atlanta.
4. The beautiful beautiful mountains!!
3. Swimming in the coldest water holes supplied by fresh mountain water. And jumping off rocks.
2. Crisp, chilly, foggy summer mornings.
1. Local food. Buying fresh figs and blackberries from the gentleman farmer that comes into the downtown restaurants. And then eating said figs for breakfast with yogurt, honey, and walnuts. YUMMMMM. And making blackberry cobbler with orange essence in the crust. Oh yes. You know you want it.
If you aren't from here, or aren't familiar with the area, you really should check it out. And this coming from a person that silently curses the stupid tourists, especially when they attempt to parallel park for 15 minutes before just giving up and driving away, all the while you've been sitting behind them, waiting, because they can't get their big freakin' SUV into the space, or out of the way enough for you to scoot by. And this is NOT a hard town to drive in. AT ALL.
But seriously, if you haven't visited, you should. I hear the leaf change this year is going to be glorious.
7.23.2008
Boo's Top Ten: Reasons I Should Not Have Left Bed Today
10. Nearly sprained my ankle getting out of bed.
9. Nearly breaking my dog's leg by almost spraining my ankle getting out of bed.
8. Late for work.
7. I might not have a place to live when I move out of my rental. Next week.
6. Fighting with the hubs is bad for sex life.
5. No breakfast due to being late for work.
4. Was awake past 2:30 am again. Couldn't sleep.
3. No clean socks. At least, no good clean socks. Everything is packed up to move.
2. Unusually expensive water bill. Like, as in, three times the normal water bill. Which might mean we have a leak, but you know what, fuck it, I'm moving out; my landlord can deal with it.
1. I want to murder everyone that crosses my path with eye daggers. That is probably a good indicator that I should not leave the house. Much less come into contact with....people...
ugh.
9. Nearly breaking my dog's leg by almost spraining my ankle getting out of bed.
8. Late for work.
7. I might not have a place to live when I move out of my rental. Next week.
6. Fighting with the hubs is bad for sex life.
5. No breakfast due to being late for work.
4. Was awake past 2:30 am again. Couldn't sleep.
3. No clean socks. At least, no good clean socks. Everything is packed up to move.
2. Unusually expensive water bill. Like, as in, three times the normal water bill. Which might mean we have a leak, but you know what, fuck it, I'm moving out; my landlord can deal with it.
1. I want to murder everyone that crosses my path with eye daggers. That is probably a good indicator that I should not leave the house. Much less come into contact with....people...
ugh.
3.28.2008
Boo's Top Ten: Heart Loves
I might as well ride this wave of good cheer while it lasts. (I'm notorious for extreme passion in whatever emotion I'm currently experiencing. You might have noticed. But probably not.)
So, here is my current Top Ten: Heart Loves
10. A warm sunny spot on the soft grass that is just begging for a thick blanket, a book, and a cold margarita.
9. On that note: cold margaritas with fresh lime juice and Patron. No sour mix, please!!
8. Days when you look good, feel good, and all the world knows it.
7. People who are polite in traffic. Thank you!
6. Bums that don't ask me for money, a kiss, or demand anything from me in general. Copper John, in Atlanta: I love you!!! And thank you for my amazing bracelet, the excellent conversation, and your infective energy.
5. Food service industry workers who are pleasant and thoughtful. (The exact opposite: people who think they are too good for their jobs, and basically make everyone else suffer for it. Boooooo!!!!--and not in the good way that is my name.)
4. People who dance like no one is watching. I love you ALL! Even if you can't dance. Maybe especially if you can't dance. You rock.
3. People who are open and aren't afraid to show it. Human emotion is beautiful, terrifying, and completely awesome. (And that is "awesome" used in the dictionarial sense, not the dude-sense.)
2. Moments of good surprise. (Like a smile from the co-worker that is a notorious grump, or a laugh from the groaner, etc. I live for dichotomy.)
and drum roll for the Number One Heart Love of March 2008 is.....
1. People who live their lives honestly and full of passion. My word for the month is passion. Yay for PASSION.
So, here is my current Top Ten: Heart Loves
10. A warm sunny spot on the soft grass that is just begging for a thick blanket, a book, and a cold margarita.
9. On that note: cold margaritas with fresh lime juice and Patron. No sour mix, please!!
8. Days when you look good, feel good, and all the world knows it.
7. People who are polite in traffic. Thank you!
6. Bums that don't ask me for money, a kiss, or demand anything from me in general. Copper John, in Atlanta: I love you!!! And thank you for my amazing bracelet, the excellent conversation, and your infective energy.
5. Food service industry workers who are pleasant and thoughtful. (The exact opposite: people who think they are too good for their jobs, and basically make everyone else suffer for it. Boooooo!!!!--and not in the good way that is my name.)
4. People who dance like no one is watching. I love you ALL! Even if you can't dance. Maybe especially if you can't dance. You rock.
3. People who are open and aren't afraid to show it. Human emotion is beautiful, terrifying, and completely awesome. (And that is "awesome" used in the dictionarial sense, not the dude-sense.)
2. Moments of good surprise. (Like a smile from the co-worker that is a notorious grump, or a laugh from the groaner, etc. I live for dichotomy.)
and drum roll for the Number One Heart Love of March 2008 is.....
1. People who live their lives honestly and full of passion. My word for the month is passion. Yay for PASSION.
3.18.2008
Boo's Top Ten: Pet Peeves
Hi! I'm Boo. I'm a bitch. Have we met?
10. People who chew food with their mouths open. Bonus points if you are extra noisy!!!
9. People who demand my time without contributing any of their own. Like, don't complain about me not calling you, if you never fucking call me either! Dick.
8. People who CHOOSE to be oblivious in public places. Yes, I've been standing behind your grocery cart that is blocking the entire aisle while you argue with someone on your cell phone about which brand of spaghetti is better. Yes, I've made eye contact with you about three times. What? A dirty look? Oh god, strike me down for the fear in my heart. Get out of my way, you douche.
7. People who treat service industry employees as slaves. As a former waitress: fuck you.
6. Politicians. As a general rule.
5. People who allow their young female children to have anything to do with Paris Hilton. As a future retiree: fuck you.
4. And on that note: celebrities that are famous for no exceptional reason. Oh, you're the daughter of the guy that got O.J. acquitted? Well, shove a stick up your ass and call you important. Twatburger.
3. Anyone who thinks "feminist" is a bad word. As a feminist: well, you know.
2. Pro-lifers. Wanting to save a cluster of cells, but supporting capital punishment, is a bit of a fucking conundrum, isn't it, you fucks? And BOMBING clinics that provide medical care to make a political statement about death? I just can't...
And the Number One MOST ANNOYING THING IN THE WORLD!!!!
Interrupters. Hey! Interrupters of the world: fah-q.
Moral of the story: I must hate people.
10. People who chew food with their mouths open. Bonus points if you are extra noisy!!!
9. People who demand my time without contributing any of their own. Like, don't complain about me not calling you, if you never fucking call me either! Dick.
8. People who CHOOSE to be oblivious in public places. Yes, I've been standing behind your grocery cart that is blocking the entire aisle while you argue with someone on your cell phone about which brand of spaghetti is better. Yes, I've made eye contact with you about three times. What? A dirty look? Oh god, strike me down for the fear in my heart. Get out of my way, you douche.
7. People who treat service industry employees as slaves. As a former waitress: fuck you.
6. Politicians. As a general rule.
5. People who allow their young female children to have anything to do with Paris Hilton. As a future retiree: fuck you.
4. And on that note: celebrities that are famous for no exceptional reason. Oh, you're the daughter of the guy that got O.J. acquitted? Well, shove a stick up your ass and call you important. Twatburger.
3. Anyone who thinks "feminist" is a bad word. As a feminist: well, you know.
2. Pro-lifers. Wanting to save a cluster of cells, but supporting capital punishment, is a bit of a fucking conundrum, isn't it, you fucks? And BOMBING clinics that provide medical care to make a political statement about death? I just can't...
And the Number One MOST ANNOYING THING IN THE WORLD!!!!
Interrupters. Hey! Interrupters of the world: fah-q.
Moral of the story: I must hate people.
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