I was surprised when I read down the list of reddit comments and saw that, in most other countries, tampons without applicators are the standard. And in fact, the attitude is mainly that applicator tampons are for girls who have just started menstruating. But not in America. And why is that? Why are American women basically forced to use tampons with applicators?
I think, in large part, that it is the American culture surrounding feminine hygiene, body parts, menstruation, and all other things wholly belonging to women as being "icky". GOD FORBID you touch your own vagina. I'm pretty sure that menstruating is one of THE most natural things IN THE WORLD, just like sperm.
This isn't restricted to female bodily functions, either. Men are also taught that, other than sexual situations, to not be comfortable with one's own body.
Newsflash: It is YOUR body. And there is nothing "gross" or "icky" about the natural, healthy things that is does.
Ladies: Using tampons without applicators is not only HEALTHIER for your vag, it is also much more environmentally friendly. So, give her a whirl. Touch your girl.
5. Laurie Keller, Cougartown
At first glance, Laurie is everything that I despise about TV females: insipid, focused on looks, bimbo-ish. But she has LAYERS, man. She has fears and issues that I think a lot of women can probably relate to, even if every other word out of her mouth is "Like." (Also, Busy Philipps: Makes me laugh, was in Freaks and Geeks, seems super down to Earth, and, LIKE, a real person, so, she wins.)
4. Kate Beckett, Castle
My favorite moments watching Kate Beckett are when she goes into the interrogation room. That woman is a hard ass! And, not only is she a hard ass, but she traverses a line of hard ass whereas other women in the same position would be seen as bitches. As a female character, she is fabulously feminine will still maintaining the hard ass persona. So, congrats on creating a fabulous character, Marlowe.
3. Dr. Temperance "Bones" Brennan, Bones
She is on, LIKE, every top ten list for female characters, and there is good reason: She is probably one of the most unique female characters on television. She doesn't get jokes because she is so literal and scientific about everything, and when she finally gets them, she makes a bad one in return, and laughs uproariously. Priceless. Also, you can't go wrong putting the (warning: heresy approaching) more interesting (read: less over exposed) Deschanel in that role.
2. Olivia Dunham, Fringe
Oh my goodness, where do I start? Olivia, Olivia, Olivia. A tortured soul that wraps herself in the protective shell of law enforcement. Nothing shakes Olivia—I mean, seriously, NOTHING. I guess that is what happens when you are used as a subject in a variety of traumatic experiments when you were wee. And even when she is shaken, or injured, or just fucked up in general over something, she can still seal the deal (meaning, protect herself with her gun by shooting someone's ass). Additionally, Anna Torv could easily be one of the best actresses on television, period. Easily.
1. Coach Shannon Beiste, Glee
Finally, my number one choice of best female TV character is Coach Beiste on Glee. I know, Sue Sylvester seems like such a good, and obvious choice, and I LOVE Sue, but not in the way that I love Beiste. At 6'3" and the coach of the boys football team (and yes, I realize that there are few, if any, high school girls foottball teams, but I used the italics to make a point, see?), she is a woman that you do not fuck with. On the outside, she is masculine as hell, and she puts on a strong front to maintain that power. But, on the inside, she just wants to be a beautiful, petite ballerina that gets some ass. I mean, come on, has there been a character like Shannon Beiste on television? Ever? I. Love. Her. And I love Dot-Marie Jones, especially the more I read about her. World champion arm wrestler by 19, Olympic athlete, one of the only women warriors on the short-lived Knights and Warriors, and was offered a role in professional wrestling but turned it down because it was "too fakey." FUCK YES.
Strong women rock.
Amber Heard has been out for a while, but I guess we are all just now finding out. Why is this "newsworthy"? Because apparently it's big news when a beautiful woman who doesn't sport a mullet is a lesbian.
Unreal. I'm shaking my head right now.
Big congrats to Amber, who obviously has a better grasp on who she is as a person than most young women in Hollywood.
UPDATE: The TSA has posted these two security camera videos to refute this woman's story. I think the footage is inconclusive, but I guess watch for yourselves and see. (In the first video, the woman enters the frame at 1:13. In the second video, she enters at 0:03.)
This post, from one of my favorite websites (www.adventure-journal.com), unwittingly became a kind of lighting rod for a discussion on whether female athletes/models are being used for their looks to sell magazines.
You know: I have to say that, YES. Outside Magazine is using these women for their attractive qualities, rather than focusing on their athletic ability.
Any serious athlete is more likely to have a tight, muscled physique than most—so why focus on that? Why not shoot a cover with those women actually doing what it is they are good at? Why do we have to relegate EVERYONE to a freakin' sexual object? And this goes for male athletes as well.
Something I have learned as I grow (older, if not wiser) is that life is full of gray areas. Often, we seek answers to questions that have none, and this is an uncomfortable place to exist for most people. We like our world nice and structured. Paper or plastic. Truth or dare. God or no god. Gay or straight. This or that. This doesn't allow for a lot of room for where most of us fall, which is usually somewhere in between: The dreaded gray area.
There has been a lot of attention in the gay community lately about coming out, sparked by the recent string of tragic suicides, many of which are related to being bullied because of one's sexuality. It is so sad to me that being closeted is still extremely common, but it is easy to see why many members of the gay community continue to live in the closet. There is pressure on both sides of the fence: Don't come out because of the inevitable judgement; or come out because of the pressure to be supportive. I like to call this: The dreaded gay area.
So what does it mean for the many of us that are Mostly Straight? It is important for us to come out to support our gay brothers and sisters, aunts, uncles, cousins, parents, and friends? Is it productive? Would it start a true conversation?
These are perfect examples of those gray areas. Most likely, there is no right answer. Most definitely, this is a choice that each individual must make for themselves.
But I ask this: Is it important? And why?
The reason I say this is because I struggled as a young girl with my own sexuality, but in a different way: I was attracted to men, but I was also attracted to women. It wasn't until college that I was able to admit my bisexuality, and even then, most people I know don't know that I'm bi.
But I don't have the same struggle that so many LGBT kids do. And that is why this project—The Trevor Project—is so important.
If you know someone struggling with their sexuality, being bullied for the sexuality, or just struggling with life in general, direct them to this YouTube channel; the It Gets Better channel. It is full of support from people who have "been there" for those trying to get past the negative crap and just live their happy, gay little lives.
Please go to this page and support it by watching the videos. Many had me in tears, and laughter, sometimes both at once. It is a big ol' hug for your heart.
You see, I have some big projects underway that have been sucking my time away like a Lohan in a coke store, and it has been a bit of a "do" to get back to everything that I enjoy doing.
But big things will be happening around here. Very big things. And I hope you all are here when they happen, because they will be big. And stuff.
Quick Update on Boo-ness:
How are YOU?
The weather is finally starting to get more bearable here in ye olde mountains, so Saturday I spent the better part of the day in my yard hauling rocks large and small, mounds of dirt, planting my "booshes" and raking up leaves for mulch. By the time it started raining, I was filthy, exhausted, and happy. I took the BEST shower, shaved my legs for the first time since autumn (dead serious), and painted my toenails while watching a girlie movie with my roomie. I followed that wonderful relaxation up with a meal at my favorite mexicano restaurant (margarita, of course). Bliss.
Sunday morning, I met my sweet group of gals (and took my sweet unboyfriend along with me) to the BEST brunch in town: Stoney Knob Cafe (mimosas and a benny--le sigh). Then we took the party back to my house where me and the gals indulged in some serious nostalgia: Wilson Phillips, En Vogue, Paula Abdul, and a full-on rendition of the Little Mermaid, sung a capella of course. Add some homemade strawberry shortcake, a quick visit from my brother, and a great session of multiple O's, and I am a happy happy almost-out-of-my-twenties girl.
And I feel sexy. Verrrrry sexy. (It helps that I placed a mirror right by my bed where I can just glance over and...see certain...things. Yeah.)
I'm spending my ACTUAL birthday in NYC with my two best friends. Which rocks.
If my thirties are going in this direction, then things just got much better.
These things never happen to me. Wait, no no no. I never LET these things happen to me. If I feel negative, or have a bad experience I usually push my emotions about it away. Word to the wise: This will not do. Not at all.
They don't go away. Ever. Even if you learn to deal with the things that shape you as a person, they never go away. I went through six months of therapy after me and the ex-husband split, and during that time I was able to start learning how to get in touch with those deep dark places within, and hopefully help some of that shit come out into the light. It was really hard, and even though I was trying to be as open as I could in those sessions, I knew I was editing. I knew it as I sat there and cried harder than I have cried in my life, and that is a scary feeling. It is scary knowing that you aren't going nearly as deep as you should, but even at that depth there is such terror and fear. It was intense, and almost overwhelming.
Well, those very deep things that I can hardly look in the face started to surface within me the other night. It was after a conversation with my sister, and as soon as I put down the phone, I felt something burbling up. But instead of dealing with what was coming up in me (abandonment, rejection, fear) I pushed it away and started acting out. And I starting acting out on a person in my life that I know loves me very very much. Someone who I've been able to share more of myself than with any other person in my life, except for mey lifetime best friend. And I hurt this person. And I hurt me. And I kept going. I was out of control.
Now I'm out of town on business, trying to be focused while at the same time trying to pay attention to what is happening inside of me. I've gotten so good at pushing negative things away—so very good that, a week after my dad died, I was right back at work and acting like normal. God, I have buried so much shit. And my failed marriage is one more victim, along with the countless number of friends and family members that I've pushed away or just dropped.
I think it is time for me to do the hard work.
I must admit: I'm scared shitless right now.
Saturn has motherfucking returned.
black thigh high stockings
red post-ceremony wedding dress with a slit to my hip
red silk kimono robe
the highest heels i own
gold sequin beret
gold 2010 sunglasses, courtesy of my recent trip to NYC
If this is how my year is going to shape up, then I must admit, I'm pretty pleased.
But damn if that crazy moon didn't kick my ass.