11.30.2009
Boo's Nuggets of Wisdumb
Sometimes, the difference between a happy life and a sad life is the choice of how you see it. Sometimes, it is the pleasure with which you take a shit.
11.25.2009
Boo's Top Five: Awesome Things About Today!!
5. It's the day before Thanksgiving. And I'm starving!4. I get off work at 2:00pm for drinks with some of my favorite people!
3. There was an inchworm on my shoulder this morning!
2. I'm revisiting my late 90's music collection. Oh Natalie Merchant, how I love to sing along with you!1. I love exclamation points!
11.24.2009
Austin, We have an Issue.
I consider myself a normal, healthy woman in her almost-prime. (I'll be 30 on my next.) Now, the way I understand it, most normal healthy women start to hit their sexual peak somewhere in their mid to late 30s.
As of the last couple of months, I have thought of almost nothing but sex. I used to think about it a lot before that, but now I think about it CONSTANTLY. In fact, it is becoming difficult to function because I am being bombarded by blistering blasts of bedlust. I can't concentrate on even the simplest things. I get turned on by the most innocent things. Like taking a turn too fast on the road. Or watching someone--that I'm not even ATTRACTED to--stretch. And things are going downhill rather quickly.
Austin, we have an issue.
This isn't an issue of not getting any. I am getting any. I'm getting GOOD any. And compared to my last relationship, and many before that, I'm getting a lotta good any. So I have to wonder: Is my getting any directly contributing to the Katrina-like flooding I'm currently experiencing in my downtown highrise?
I'm sure the answer is: Yes, a little.
But GOD: I have TEN MORE YEARS of this?????
FUCK.
Oh fuck. I said "fuck".
Now I'm "on" again.
CHRIST.
Hmm. I bet he was good at it.
DAMMIT!
As of the last couple of months, I have thought of almost nothing but sex. I used to think about it a lot before that, but now I think about it CONSTANTLY. In fact, it is becoming difficult to function because I am being bombarded by blistering blasts of bedlust. I can't concentrate on even the simplest things. I get turned on by the most innocent things. Like taking a turn too fast on the road. Or watching someone--that I'm not even ATTRACTED to--stretch. And things are going downhill rather quickly.
Austin, we have an issue.
This isn't an issue of not getting any. I am getting any. I'm getting GOOD any. And compared to my last relationship, and many before that, I'm getting a lotta good any. So I have to wonder: Is my getting any directly contributing to the Katrina-like flooding I'm currently experiencing in my downtown highrise?
I'm sure the answer is: Yes, a little.
But GOD: I have TEN MORE YEARS of this?????
FUCK.
Oh fuck. I said "fuck".
Now I'm "on" again.
CHRIST.
Hmm. I bet he was good at it.
DAMMIT!
Boo's Nuggets of Wisdumb
Sometimes, all you need to do to change your perspective is to get a new chair.
It also makes you get off your ass.
It also makes you get off your ass.
11.20.2009
Photo Love: Dog Loves Cheese
Don't worry, I didn't tease her with it all day. I did eventually give it to her.
After I laughed and laughed and laughed! Mercy!
11.18.2009
11.16.2009
Saturday Night Jollies Follies
The events I am about to relate really happened this past Saturday night.
I come home with my "friend". I have a backache from building a deck all day. I am in pain, but nothing serious. I am, however, in need of some serious, ahem, sexual healing.
"Friend" falls asleep. I am without relief. I begin to relieve myself, as was a habit during the last stages of my mostly sexless marriage.
Just as I'm reaching liftoff, "friend" wakes up (because apparently I was moaning), and asks me, "Are you ok? Do you need a doctor?"
I promptly lose my liftoff.
"What?" I ask.
"Do you need a doctor?"
...
"For my orgasm?"
"Oh. I thought you were in pain. Because of your back."
We laugh. Alot. And then we both relieve each other. Several times.
I come home with my "friend". I have a backache from building a deck all day. I am in pain, but nothing serious. I am, however, in need of some serious, ahem, sexual healing.
"Friend" falls asleep. I am without relief. I begin to relieve myself, as was a habit during the last stages of my mostly sexless marriage.
Just as I'm reaching liftoff, "friend" wakes up (because apparently I was moaning), and asks me, "Are you ok? Do you need a doctor?"
I promptly lose my liftoff.
"What?" I ask.
"Do you need a doctor?"
...
"For my orgasm?"
"Oh. I thought you were in pain. Because of your back."
We laugh. Alot. And then we both relieve each other. Several times.
11.12.2009
Thank You Note
Geoff,
I'm happy my experiences have helped to put something into perspective for you. I constantly struggle with whether or not I should talk about my life on the internet, so I really appreciate your reaching out. It is good to know that I can be a friend to a stranger, at least for a moment in time. Keep on keepin' on, brother.
-Boo
I'm happy my experiences have helped to put something into perspective for you. I constantly struggle with whether or not I should talk about my life on the internet, so I really appreciate your reaching out. It is good to know that I can be a friend to a stranger, at least for a moment in time. Keep on keepin' on, brother.
-Boo
11.11.2009
Boo's Top Five: Things I Love Today
5. Mastering the art of the Snooze.
I think I have finally found my sweet spot in the War on Waking (WoW). I usually set my alarm for about an hour before I know I should be out of bed (I know, I'm kind of a masochist in that way), and then I hit my alarm about 5 times before getting out of bed. That method was not making me a happy camper. Now, I still wake at the hour early mark, but then set my snooze for an hour of uninterrupted sleep. Result? Happy Morning Boo!
4. Rain boots.
Silly me, thinking hurricane season was over! But at least I got to break out my ubercute rain boots!
3. Sweet puppy kisses.
Yes, she has had a bad habit lately of eating my bread products, but I did say I wanted to eat less carbs, so maybe she is just looking out for me. However, the baguette buried under my pillow was a less-than-happy discovery. But then it made me laugh. So, win win, I guess.
2. Black Currant Probiotic juice [currently testing: Good Belly brand]
This stuff is SO MUCH better than trying to choke down a thick mess of kefir in the morning when I don't feel like eating anything, much less a thicker version of yogurt that takes five minutes to pour out of the damn container because is it SO THICK. On top of it NOT being kefir, it actually tastes like delicious, gourmet grape juice. Win win!
1. Mexican mocha from Izzy's.
A delicious hot mocha with cayenne pepper from my favorite coffee spot. Ahhhhhhh CAFFEINE.
I think I have finally found my sweet spot in the War on Waking (WoW). I usually set my alarm for about an hour before I know I should be out of bed (I know, I'm kind of a masochist in that way), and then I hit my alarm about 5 times before getting out of bed. That method was not making me a happy camper. Now, I still wake at the hour early mark, but then set my snooze for an hour of uninterrupted sleep. Result? Happy Morning Boo!
4. Rain boots.
Silly me, thinking hurricane season was over! But at least I got to break out my ubercute rain boots!
3. Sweet puppy kisses.
Yes, she has had a bad habit lately of eating my bread products, but I did say I wanted to eat less carbs, so maybe she is just looking out for me. However, the baguette buried under my pillow was a less-than-happy discovery. But then it made me laugh. So, win win, I guess.
2. Black Currant Probiotic juice [currently testing: Good Belly brand]
This stuff is SO MUCH better than trying to choke down a thick mess of kefir in the morning when I don't feel like eating anything, much less a thicker version of yogurt that takes five minutes to pour out of the damn container because is it SO THICK. On top of it NOT being kefir, it actually tastes like delicious, gourmet grape juice. Win win!
1. Mexican mocha from Izzy's.
A delicious hot mocha with cayenne pepper from my favorite coffee spot. Ahhhhhhh CAFFEINE.
11.09.2009
F*ck Like a Rabbit
First of all, I have two words for you: regrown penises.
Which brings me to a question.
Why rabbits? I mean, as far as I know, they aren't endangered and clearly don't have reproductive issues, thus the saying "fuck like a rabbit".
I don't know, couldn't they have tried to regrow another animal's penis? Maybe one that needs help, like the Giant Panda? Or a polar bear?
Oh, and on my feminist rant side: WTF! Science makes it easier for men to knock up women. When are they gonna make a penis that shoots blanks? What about MALE BIRTH CONTROL that doesn't involve clipping tubes?
Come AHN.
Which brings me to a question.
Why rabbits? I mean, as far as I know, they aren't endangered and clearly don't have reproductive issues, thus the saying "fuck like a rabbit".
I don't know, couldn't they have tried to regrow another animal's penis? Maybe one that needs help, like the Giant Panda? Or a polar bear?
Oh, and on my feminist rant side: WTF! Science makes it easier for men to knock up women. When are they gonna make a penis that shoots blanks? What about MALE BIRTH CONTROL that doesn't involve clipping tubes?
Come AHN.
Tech Geek
So, I have an iPhone. I love it (for the most part), but like the fickle, choosy betch I am, I'm looking for the next generation of younger, hipper, cooler, better.
On that note: Anyone getting a Droid?
Give me the lowdown please.
On that note: Anyone getting a Droid?
Give me the lowdown please.
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