Our softball team had a game last night (did I mention we suck? we suck) and as we were warming up ( I was slated to play first base) the shortstop (who throws really hard) threw to me and I dislocated my finger. I wish I had taken a picture of it while it was out, but I couldn't stand it and I immediately popped it back into place.
Let me tell you something: for those of you fortunate enough to never have experience a dislocated finger, it is completely disgusting. For example:
This is exactly what my finger looked like, except it was my ring finger. Gross, eh?
It was strange; I knew the ball had hit my hand pretty hard, and I was getting ready to throw it back when I looked down at my hand and saw it all mangled.
I immediately had to look away from it and pop it back into place. (My brother has played rugby for years, and I have seen him relocate fingers many times. I was confident I could do it.)
So here is what it looks like today:
It is pretty swollen and starting to bruise, but I have some mobility and I don't think I need to see a doctor (contrary to what all my teammates and the Internet says I should do).
I mean, yeah, it is a bit painful, but I can take ibuprofen and it feels fine. The only thing I'm worried about is if I have a minor fracture or something that I can't see without an x-ray. Another issue: I HATE the doctor, hospitals, waiting rooms, etc. I would rather deal with it than go to a doctor, honestly.
Anyway, that's what is new in my world today, so of course I want to broadcast it. I love sharing injury stories, don't you? Tell me a good one.
Ooh! Ooh! I've got a good one.
ReplyDeleteRight now I have scabs on both -- yes -- both of my shins in exactly the same place. Why? Because I keep tripping over my new IKEA bedframe that's sitting in my new addition that doesn't have a mattress on it yet because we can't move in until we get our U&O permits.
Every single time I try stepping over it -- thud. It's totally ridic. I can't even wear a skirt it looks so bad.
Sheesh, that's a pussy injury. If you wanted to do it up right you should have pulled a stunt like I did when I was a kid. I ran into a fence post while playing baseball which caused my bottom teeth to go through the skin under my lip and bite about a 1/3 of the way through my tongue. Which never healed all the way back btw. That is fucking yourself up mighty good.
ReplyDeleteThere isn't much they will do for you that you didn't do for yourself (judging by the picture). I have dislocated all of my fingers at least once (thumbs are the worst) and broken all of them at least once (except for my left thumb and six at one time on a really horrible occasion). I once had a broken finger swell so badly the skin split open. i was stomped by a bull when I was 14 and it broke a rib and split my head open. My dear mother stitched my head together on the kitchen table. Childhood memories are awesome.
ReplyDeleteYou know, I have played volley ball a grand total of two times in my life: the first time I chipped my tooth, the second time I broke my finger. And with that I retired from the sport. Why do I have a feeling you're going to go back and play softball again?
ReplyDeleteI haven't really hurt myself recently (aside from the customary waking up after a night out with at least three new bruises and no idea how I managed to obtain any of them) but as a child I variously: split both my lips open to the gum (separately), fell off a cliff (less dramatic than it sounds), got poisoned, fell and landed on my head stopping me from breathing for a few minutes (comments re: possible brain damage not needed thanks) and was in an explosion.
ReplyDeleteWhich may go some way explaining why I am now an incredibly cautious (some may say "cowardly") person when it comes to activities that may involve physical harm.
litely: ok, ok, wait a minute. you've done this enough to draw blood on both legs, and you haven't moved the frame out of the way??? um, i know a word for that, and it is the opposite of S-M-R-T. no offense, of course.
ReplyDeleteonthevirg: god, that SUCKS. so your tongue still has a deep gash in it? Isn't that strange for your romantic endeavors?
bruce paine: well, good to hear that I'm doing all I can. Actually, I got a split from the drugstore last night and my swelling has decreased, and the bruising is much better. You have broken every finger?? What on earth do you do for a living? Oh, and your mom stitching your head: fucking awesome. But damn, those broken ribs hurt, and you can't do shit about it.
girlwithcurioushair: yep, i'm definitely going to play again. :) How did you know? And it sounds like you have major bad luck with volleyball. That's like me a snowboarding. Maybe that will be my next post.
alextheodd: Great Googly Moogly woman! Um, you know you have to write a post about those things now, right? I mean, you can't just throw "being in an explosion" out there without some kind of story. Spill it! But hell, after all that I would think I was Superwoman, and start jumping off tall buildings...
You realize this is punishment from above for your sick, SICK I TELLs YA IPhone Love. Repent (by mailing said sin device to the address I am happy to send you) and be saved further misery.
ReplyDeleteSince folks are sharing their gruesome injury stories, I have two really good ones and a kinda lame one.
- My mom's place is at the top of a very steep hill, and for some reason, my family insisted I learn to ride my bike on it. I subsequently slammed into a neighbor's mailbox, where the momentum of the bike somehow carried my body OVER AND AROUND said mailbox. This led to me landing face down on asphalt with a 15 lb. bike hurtling towards my tiny body. After I recovered from this, I realized that my family was trying to kill me.
- Story once again involves my family trying to make me do something, this time I was to go jogging with them. We went to this high school track that was pretty much open to the public on weekends. Somehow, while going approximately 2 MPH, I tripped and saved the flesh from both of my elbows in a vain attempt at braking. You never lived until to have tried to clean out dirt, concrete, bug carcasses, and what I hope was old bubblegum out of your dermis. Interestingly enough, I found out that my sister ALSO endured the exact same injury at another track with her friends.
- The lame story is also the one that ended up hobbling me the longest. I jumped off a 5 ft. high hall and sprained my ankle. Ended up getting a cast. The End.
Sure thing, send me your address. I'll send you something REAL special.
ReplyDeleteOh, and this explains so much, you know. I mean, your family's constant attempt at filia-cide (is that even a word? If not, copyright: me!)
Do you need a hug? Come 'ere, ya big lug.
Stone mason, every finger except my left thumb. yeah, my momma is really cool. The cut was an inch and three quarters long and she put over thirty stitches in it. It took her over an hour. But, she thinks her baby boy is handsome and wanted him to stay that way. If a doctor had done it he wouldn't have put more than 8 in it, and the scar would have been much larger. but nothing I said compares with the coolness of being in an explosion. that alex chick must be awesome.
ReplyDeleteY'all really don't want to play the injury game with me.
ReplyDeleteYOU REALLY DON'T.
Jeez TK, you are so competitive. Oh, and too late.
ReplyDelete